Playing “hard to get” is a classic game involving two people, one playing the pursuer and the other: the pursued. The rules of the game are difficult to grasp, and require skillful mastery of the art of role play. The crux of the game is dependent on the mutual attraction of players. One wants to be chased after, while the other wants to do the chasing. Both play the game in order to prolong the anticipation of fulfilling their desire to be together. As the pursuer it may be difficult to judge whether the other player is actually playing the “hard to get” part, or is really not interested. If done correctly, they will not fail to drop hints, signals, cues that you are both indeed on the path to achieving what you both want.

 

I recently had a failed pursuit. Usually, I am the one being pursued, but tend to give in quickly as I pass myself off as a girl who “doesn’t play games”, and have no strength to hold out when I really want something. I will admit however, that games are fun as long as no one gets hurt. Playing hard to get can be thrilling, increasing sexual tension through suspence. So until yesterday I thought I was pursuing willing prey through a tangle of innuendo. I was absolutely positive that he was as intent on seeing the game all the way to the expected conclusion, until suddenly, it just didn’t make sense. He was sending new signals, indicating that he had quit and thought I should too. Of course, he never said, I’ve thought it through and I don’t want you after all. He simply walked off the field.

 

Shocked, I still don’t understand what happened. On my end, I feel again rejected by someone I wanted. Little over a month ago my steady boyfriend broke it off, and now this. I don’t know how much rejection I can take before I lose my confidence all together. Am I getting old? Fat? Ugly? What happened? I used to see something, want something, get something (in that order). Now, it seems the great and mighty Universe is working against me. Acheivement is slippery, I can’t seem to get a handle on life or love. I am floundering in a sea of confusion and self-loathing is creeping up my spine.

 

There are no answers here, just the simple facts of the matter. Rejection sucks, especially when it leaves you wondering exactly how much of a jackass you made yourself out to be before walking away.